The Vigil Idiot

Unintentionally Funny, Must-Watch Bollywood Movies: Teen Patti

Sahil Rizwan — Thu, 04 Mar 2010 02:50:06 +0000

To paraphrase one Colonel Hans Landa, I regret to inform you that I’ve exhausted the extent of my English… for these crappy prologues, anyway. Yes, my vocabulary is limited to one intro a week. Thus, we skip this part for today and make do with the statement that this movie sucks donkey balls!

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Unintentionally Funny, Must-Watch Bollywood Movies: Karthik Calling Karthik

Sahil Rizwan — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 03:32:04 +0000

There’re a lot of pretty obvious jokes I can go for in this intro here right about now. Something along the lines of how the director should’ve called himself to tell him about how the movie was gonna pan out… Or the crowd favourite joke, about how I thought Karthik Calling Karthik was a movie about Dinesh and Murali Karthik trying to improve their running between the wickets.

But why delay the PJ-filled awfulness of the comic with more PJs, right? Presenting the KCK strip, for your consideration.

Download and save the strip from here!

PS – Regular readers probably got the last panel reference here. The irregulars – Having to explain a joke is the ultimate level of fail, so pliss to be reading the Veer wala comic (http://www.thevigilidiot.com/2010/01/26/veer/) to make more sense of the Salim-Javed feud LOLz yourself. =)

Unintentionally Funny, Must-Watch Bollywood Movies: My Name Is Khan

Sahil Rizwan — Tue, 16 Feb 2010 02:10:41 +0000

Well, enough has been said about this movie to fill a thousand such customary intros, so I won’t bother. Suffice it to say that Taran Adarsh rated the movie 5 1/2 stars in a syndicated review that I can’t find the link to anymore. And, because I consider everything that man says with the seriousness of the impending 2012 apocalypse, it is with a heavy heart that I present this comic to you.

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Unintentionally Funny, Must-Watch, Bollywood Movies: Striker

Sahil Rizwan — Mon, 08 Feb 2010 23:46:31 +0000

Ever seen a movie that leaves absolutely no impression on you? You know what I’m talking about. It’s the movie you decide to watch for lack of better options & don’t care for enough to remember after you’ve actually seen it. You don’t really hate it, but can’t tell why you don’t like it, either. Striker is that movie. Underwhelming, I think, the word is. Like the iPad…. Or Tushaar Kapoor.

PS – All non-celebrity characters in the strip have been illustrated to scale. True story.
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Unintentionally Funny, Must-Watch Bollywood Movies: Rann

Sahil Rizwan — Tue, 02 Feb 2010 23:37:30 +0000

The Ram Gopal Verma directed, Amitabh Bachchan starrer, Rann is a hard-hitting saga. It is an inside-look at the news media today and how pathetic and sold-out it’s become. This is the part where you find humour in the first two sentences and move on to the comic.

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Unintentionally Funny, Must-Watch Bollywood Movies: Veer

Sahil Rizwan — Tue, 26 Jan 2010 01:11:23 +0000

Being directed by Anil Sharma, of Sunny Deol rips out handpump to kick neighbourhood ass fame, Veer was always gonna be a testosterone fest, regardless of the who the actors were. But when your lead is Salman Khan… in a story written by Salman Khan… over 20 years… That’s when testosterone levels touch awesome proportions of epic!

And make no mistake, this movie is epic, in every sense of the term! Now, there’re a million pretty obvious jokes that could follow that line, so I’m gonna let you choose. Fill in the blank with the superlative of your choice.

An epic _________:

- Fail

- Waste of Time

- Exercise in not ripping every strand of hair out from your scalp

- Synonym for ‘So Mind-Numbingly Awful, I’d rather watch Radio again’.

If you can’t see the strip, click this link, and use the ‘Download Now’ button (BELOW THE “REALLY SMALL IMAGE THAT YOU CAN”T SEE PROPERLY”) to save it on your comp! Why have people not been able to make sense of that yet?

Unintentionally Funny, Must-Watch Bollywood Movies: Chance Pe Dance

Sahil Rizwan — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 22:37:27 +0000

You know, I have a pretty keen sense for how much I’m gonna like a movie from its trailers. And Chance Pe Dance was one movie I’d just been waiting with bated breath for. True story! I mean – Shahid Kapoor… in a bubblegum romantic comedy… and a life-lesson delivered through a story that largely revolves around dancing. What more could a guy ask for, right?

DOWNLOAD THE STRIP FROM HERE! FREE! FREE! FREE!

Unintentionally Funny, Must-Watch Bollywood Movies: Pyaar Impossible

Sahil Rizwan — Mon, 11 Jan 2010 21:46:11 +0000

You know how in college there’re always these couple of guys who’ve just gotten their hands on a digicam & have deemed themselves short-filmmaking Spielbergs reincarnate? You know the type – Fab Indian… Long hair… Lenin-ish beards… Pretentious… Douchy…

Well… Now, what do you get when you take one of these douches, take away the design student apparel, make him over to resemble a monkey and put him in a family that, instead of the handicam, gives him 25 Crores. Yep! You get the unparalleled Uday Chopra genius, that is Pyaar Impossible.

DOWNLOAD THE STRIP FROM HERE.

Unintentionally Funny, Must-Watch Bollywood Movies: 3 Idiots

Sahil Rizwan — Mon, 28 Dec 2009 23:28:18 +0000

At the time of writing, 3 Idiots has already gone on to become what is, evidently, the biggest opening weekend a Bollywood movie has ever seen. Now, considering that the previous record holder was also an Aamir Khan movie, this should hardly come as a surprise. If I stop writing now, will anyone even notice? No one ever actually reads this part, do they? o_O

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Unintentionally Funny, Must-Watch Hollywood Movies: Avatar

Sahil Rizwan — Thu, 24 Dec 2009 23:34:01 +0000

Alright, before we get into this, I would like to state on the record that when I say ‘Avatar’ is a “must-watch” movie, I mean it in the sincerest, least sarcastic & Vigil Idioty sense of the term. In all honesty, if you haven’t seen this movie in 3D, you’ve missed out on something really special.

Having said that, while the movie does offer a ginormously awesome visual spectacle, the story isn’t exactly what you’d call 300 million dollars worthy. Yes, that statement has been sugar-coated to levels I thought were beyond me.

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