Before we start, a retraction. A few of you were kind enough to point out that I’d picked on the Sex & The City 2 people a little unfairly on at least one count. So, let it be known that there are, in fact, women in Abu Dhabi who wear designer Versace outfits underneath their Burkhas. Apologies to the makers of the film. But your film was still shit.

Now, I am man enough to own up to a mistake when I make one. I will always call a spade a spade. As a corollary, you can safely assume that I will not call a card that is not a spade a spade. For example, you will *never* see me buy the rights to a semi-popular Hollywood flick, take a gazillion creative liberties with it, add my own Ekta Kapoor-esque ending, and market it as an official remake… Unlike the makers of this louliness of a film.

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Couple of shoutouts to Atrisa & @MumbaiCentral here! I’m sure you lovely ladies can figure out your contributions to this comic. Many thanks! =)

Before I start, I think I should make a couple of things clear. Having an elder sister meant that, growing up, I had absolutely no control over the remote. What this, in essence, meant was that I either had to watch what she did, or grow up a nerd in the pursuit of a meaningful career not dictated by stick figures. This, for better or for worse, has given me a fairly high tolerance for “chick flicks”, as they call it. I’ve seen everything from ‘The Bold & The Beautiful’ (If someone could tell me if Brooke’s slept with every character on the show yet, I would be much grateful) to ‘Santa Barbara’ to, yes, almost every episode of Sex & The City.

The point being that this post has nothing to do with me being an alpha-male intolerant of girliness. Oh no! Sex & The City 2 is a movie so mind-numbingly crappy, it ranks right up there with some of the mind-numbingly crappiest Bollywood movies I’ve reviewed… And you guys know I’ve reviewed some major-league crappy ones!

For the uninitiated, this one slide should get you up to speed with the main protagonists of this series.

Now that you’re caught up, presenting the Sex & The City 2 comic, for your consideration.

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I’ll be honest… I’d been excited about Raavan for a while now. It’s the sorta movie that I go into knowing that it’ll either blow me away, or gimme a lotta fodder for my next comic. Well, go into it, I did… And I hope you’re not skipping out on too much work to read this, because there’s a lo-oooo-oot of fodder to be had here.

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Paathshala is an epic look at the state of our school system today. About how the commercialization of education will be the end of us and, separately, how reality TV shows exploit children for ratings. Well, at least that’s what I *think* they were going for. What the final product actually ended up looking like is a territory best left uncharted. Unfortunately, chart it, I did. And, this, for your consideration.

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SUGGESTED READING – The man whose intelligence knows no limits… or punctuation marks. http://twitter.com/shahidkapoor

So yeah! Prince is, without question, the single-most bejesus kicking movie to come out this year! With about 10 minutes to go and our not of Persia protagonist trapped between life and death, some random dude comes out and, with scary conviction, declares, “Maine Uski Ankhon Maine Laalach Ka Virus Scan Kar Liya Tha”. ’nuff said! You can’t mess with brilliance like that!

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I’ll be honest with you. I hadn’t even heard of Shaapit till I went to Adlabs this weekend. And the only reason I watched it is because I couldn’t get tickets to LSD. Pretty depressing, it was. Anyway, there I was, in the hall, with absolutely no knowledge about the movie, the actors, the story, Nothing! But watch Shaapit I did, and I came out a satisfieder person because of it. It’s like they say, when you’re feeling down, there’s nothing like a light-hearted comedy to bring you back up.

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There’s not much to say here. Right Yaaa Wrong is a psychological thriller… starring stalwarts such as Isha Koppikar & Aryan Vaid… with a Sunny Deol dance sequence thrown in to boot. How can you go wrong with that? Really.

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Non-loyal readers, Refer here & here to get the Sholay reunion joke, yea? =)

To paraphrase one Colonel Hans Landa, I regret to inform you that I’ve exhausted the extent of my English… for these crappy prologues, anyway. Yes, my vocabulary is limited to one intro a week. Thus, we skip this part for today and make do with the statement that this movie sucks donkey balls!

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There’re a lot of pretty obvious jokes I can go for in this intro here right about now. Something along the lines of how the director should’ve called himself to tell him about how the movie was gonna pan out… Or the crowd favourite joke, about how I thought Karthik Calling Karthik was a movie about Dinesh and Murali Karthik trying to improve their running between the wickets.

But why delay the PJ-filled awfulness of the comic with more PJs, right? Presenting the KCK strip, for your consideration.

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PS – Regular readers probably got the last panel reference here. The irregulars – Having to explain a joke is the ultimate level of fail, so pliss to be reading the Veer wala comic (http://www.thevigilidiot.com/2010/01/26/veer/) to make more sense of the Salim-Javed feud LOLz yourself. =)

Well, enough has been said about this movie to fill a thousand such customary intros, so I won’t bother. Suffice it to say that Taran Adarsh rated the movie 5 1/2 stars in a syndicated review that I can’t find the link to anymore. And, because I consider everything that man says with the seriousness of the impending 2012 apocalypse, it is with a heavy heart that I present this comic to you.

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